You’ve seen it in all those feel-good movies – A barely perspiring mother has just given birth to a beautiful, healthy baby. A smiling nurse hands the baby (wrapped in a blanket, all pink and perfect) over to the glowing mother while the father looks on, beaming with pride. The mother coos
in her baby’s ear telling her how beautiful she is and the legendary mother and child bonding begins right there. Beautiful isn’t it? You have this picture perfect image imprinted in your mind for years until the day you have to deliver a baby of your very own. You’re so looking forward to being that smiling, glowing mother whispering sweet nothings in your baby’s ear, and to having the whole family gather around you admiring you and the new addition to your family. And that’s when REALITY sets in. By the time you come out of the wretched delivery room after an agonizing 18-20 hour labor, you feel like you’ve just gone to hell and back. You’re cursing the very thought of procreation and don’t have the energy to even lift your head, let alone the baby. You cannot stand the sight (or sound) of ANY relative and as far as your husband is concerned, he better stay as far away from you as possible if he doesn’t want to be turned into a human punching bag. When the baby is handed over to you for that first feeding session, you stare at it like it’s an alien from another planet. What is WRONG with me??! You wonder. Nothing sweetheart! Welcome to the baby blues!
New mothers are expected to be absolutely thrilled about motherhood and grateful for it. But the fact of the matter is that the first few weeks are always very tough. There are tremendous physical & hormonal changes going on in your body, and that, coupled with the never-ending demands of a newborn can be very daunting. The constant feedings, diaper changes and sleepless nights can leave you exhausted, depressed and generally overwhelmed. Therefore, it is very important for women to know that having these feelings DO NOT make them bad mothers. They are simply going through a medical condition that is no fault of their own. Many women have major mood swings after having a baby. You may feel happy one moment and tearful the next. It’s like an emotional roller coaster ride. These symptoms usually start right after childbirth and usually go away within ten days after delivery. This brings us to the all-important
difference between normal baby blues & post partum depression.
It is believed by many that “baby-blues” is simply the more commonly used term for post-partum depression. This is not the case. Simply speaking, baby blues is the condition in which you feel weepy, moody, sad and irritable for a week or so, and is considered a very normal part of early motherhood (60%-80% of new mothers experience the baby blues). Baby blues, are temporary and will disappear themselves requiring no treatment. In fact they can be remedied with a few hugs & naps. Postpartum depression on the other hand, is a serious medical condition in which these symptoms (and more severe ones like loss of appetite and insomnia) continue for more than two weeks. Postpartum depression requires proper treatment, counseling and support.
Postpartum depression is actually quite common. In fact, approximately 15 to 20 percent of all new mothers develop postpartum depression. It can happen even after your second or third delivery. Although a postpartum depression most commonly begins during the first three months after birth, it can start any time within the first postpartum year. Postpartum depression does not go away quickly or easily. Without treatment it can affect the quality of life and can make it very difficult to even get through the day because everything feels like such an effort. In very rare conditions, new moms will suffer from something more serious known as postpartum psychosis. This is a very serious disease and includes all the symptoms of postpartum depression and thoughts of hurting yourself or hurting the baby. In such cases, immediate medical attention is needed.
Causes
The exact cause of postpartum depression is still unknown. It is believed that the greater change in hormone levels during pregnancy and after the childbirth can cause chemical changes in the brain which play a great role in causing postpartum depression. Although there is no way to accurately predict who will develop postpartum depression, the risk of postpartum depression increases in the following situations:
- A disappointing or difficult birth
- A difficult marriage
- Depression unrelated to pregnancy
- Previous incidence of postpartum depression
- Stressful life events during pregnancy or after childbirth (such as severe illness during pregnancy, premature birth or a difficult delivery)
- A personal or family history of depression or another mental health disorder
- An unhappy or stressful childhood
- Lack of support from your partner, family and friends.
Treatment
If you are experiencing the aforementioned symptoms, take serious note of them and get help as soon as you can. Steps you can take to help yourself are:
- Talk with your doctor about how you feel. She can offer counseling/therapy and/or medicines (anti-depressants) that can help
- Talk to your partner openly about how you’re feeling. Let out your thoughts & frustrations
- Get in touch with people who can help you with child care, household chores and errands
- Try to get sufficient rest & sleep and don’t over exert yourself
- Find time to do something for yourself, even if it’s only 15 minutes a day e.g. Reading, exercising, taking a bath
- Understand that it’s okay to feel overwhelmed. Motherhood brings many changes and can be very challenging. You don’t have to be a super-mom
- Support groups are also helpful in throwing away your postpartum depression
And above all, remember that you are not alone. Many women have had or are having the same experience as you. Cut yourself some slack and don’t blame yourself for these feelings that you have no control over. Recovery from postpartum depression takes time and patience, so stay hopeful and be strong. Just remember that help IS available and that you CAN get better.
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